Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Mothers

My mum is coming to visit me for 3 days this week so I thought I share some feelings I have about her. I also found this wonderful website that has some amazing quotes about mothers.

I have conflicting images of my mother –
one. This person who wouldn’t let me do anything when I was growing up as she was very strict and straight down the line.
Two. A person who is a lost teenager and hasn’t found themselves yet.

When I was younger she was exactly that ‘my mother’. While I was a teenager I disliked her because I wasn’t aloud to do things I wanted to and she was the one stopping me from doing them. Now I look back and I thank her for being that way because I know that all the choices she made for me where the right ones. It was hard to appreciate her care at the time but now I’m starting to understand.

My father and her separated in my last years of school and I saw a completely new person. She stayed out late and didn’t seem to care what I got up to – at the time I thought she must have been going through a mid life crisis! But I realise now she was just being herself and being free. Since then I have found that she doesn’t seem to have direction in her life and still hasn’t worked out who she is. I wish I could help her and sooth all the pain and turmoil inside her. I try to guide her in the right direction but she doesn’t seem want to go there.

I know that I’m still in the process of finding out who I am- I’m reading this amazing book by Louise Hay and it is really helping me find my feet, but I wish that I could give my mum the gift of finding out who she is so she would be completely happy.

Does anyone else see 2 sides to their mother?
Or know of people that seem lost?
I’d love to hear your stories so please leave a comment.

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